When I broke my silence, I didn't think about the future. I thought only how I was going to get my point across. At the time it seemed as though it was necessary.
My abbreviation to this mess.
I meant to do it.
I knew it was going to be hard to do. So I did it, anyway.
I forbid her from opposing my ungratefulness.
Now that I see myself, there - sitting across the table at 'cafe22'. I am at this present moment just a shadow of my former self.
My misguided judgment.
So, now here I am regretting those actions, those words I shall not repeat not here nor ever. They were simply a mistake - Marco.
My ideal wish is to forget about all this vanity. I much rather come to terms with it. How would I possibly know it would end this way. I didn't.
All I know is looking back, I see pain, hurt, shallow suffering for no good reason. It just happened that way.
A plea for help.
She deserved better and so do I.
But I can't get this monkey off my back.
She wanted to take her holidays around my birthday. I told her I wanted to marry her someday. We were planning on moving in together. I think that was a straw, which broke the camels back.
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One night she came to my house, asking me to reconsider, although I didn't see it at the time, the mistake I was making.
The look she gave me, it scars me still.
She gave me a good bye hug.
And that's all that was left.
I wanted to run back after her.
Since then all I hear are songs on the radio that mock me for not knowing any better.
After all I did, she suffered, now I am taking on the guilt that I caused.
Marco, I wish you knew better. You fool of a man.
She was crazy about you.
Now, she is simply an afterthought made by your insipid nature. Now you can't have her back.
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