Square One

It is hard to fathom my reality as a 30 year old man that I am. The fact for what it's worth is I'm driven more by failure. If the opposite were true, I'd probably be the most successful person I know! On the other hand, perhaps I am blind in when it comes to what defines success or failure as it were. What I can talk to is myself in pursuit of what truly defines my character? Is success the measure of my dignity? What have I hoped to had accomplished in terms of failure? To me, the one true asset that makes me distinct has been my unmistakable character. I do not deny the truth, which is why as I look back into my past, like it was yesterday. My intuition is as clear as a sunny day, when I use to think how distinguished and respected I would become. I would dream of it in such high spirit. I can live those moments as if they happened only a minute ago. Today, I am 30 years old. Now, I live a moment of truth, that for some reason or other hasn't quite happened as of yet. It makes me wonder about where my curiosity came from so long ago. Had it completely vanished that I still recall the exact same feelings as I thought of it some time when I was 20-something? Have I reached my peak?

Through everything I've been through, the assets of such a younger man seem as if this is just a reality check. However, I love that person who believed in what future lay ahead for me. I was a strong, well-liked person, with a sense of will-to-succeed that emancipated the core of my soul. Come to think of it, back then I probably didn't care to realize how gifted a man I would be that could possibly describe such as myself an individual. There is irony in all of this after all!

A purpose I serve is in fighting for what I have never really left me. I can give myself credit for that dating back those years past.

Marco was not wrong about myself after all.