Into the Music

 As the coffee circles roundly,

as if to watch myself be stirred.

I think of the time I had today.

When in the music store at which,

my sense of belonging - I felt.

And through this well lit vinyl record store,

I can recall - 

running my fingers through the CD selections.

As my fingers did the rummaging,

I felt them getting dirtier and dirtier.

Thinking - how wonderful this whole experience is.

It can be something extraordinary to feel that 'dirty'.

Knowing how the used CD cases - emptied once of their original 

contents - now were inspiring me at this moment. 

To have been something and then to take ownership of.

This potential taking a hold of me.

Just running my fingers during this simple exercise,

inspires me.

Take me back there.

Take me back. (fast forward. . .)

Later on in my day,

I had a conversation with my father who instructed me on something curious.

He said:

I need to find a better way to express myself openly without being shy,

because he saw that artists like myself,

need to be free and not be shy under ordinary circumstances.

To then which I thought then replied.

I said:

I rather be shy about doing nothing-

than not be shy about doing it if it'd make me look stupid.

You could feel the silence between our respective responses.

(But the silence filled the room.)

It's the first conversation my dad brought up my being an artist.

(It felt dirty - take me back.)