Feel the Bern

 

January 11th 2021

Truth is this... twitter enabled Trump and verified his account no less. It follows how in Trumps alternate reality twitter served as a vehicle to tow the company line. When the seal popped and trump broke twitters code all else became compromised in real time. Twitter was suspending accounts for far less resprehensible measures allowing Trump to run free for twitters own enablement. It became circular and Trump clearly won (not the other way around) because Twitter let Trump get his way for Twitters own shot at entitlement. - Marco

John 4.4

 

 This. This I am grateful for in my true understanding of it...

○○○○○○○○○○

“I dreamed a lot when I was growing up. I told you about that. I was, as Tennessee said, a fabulist, but you have to get out of that amber dream of desire and really craft an artist out of the rudimentary tools you were born with. For the entire life of an actor, you are burnishing and sharpening and replacing tools that you need to have at their highest levels of performance—over and over again. It is never enough. You have so much to read, to listen to, to investigate, to endure. Your heart has to be broken and to mend. Your mind has to be challenged and stretched and adapted. Your body has to be strong and supple and tough. It is an almost impossible task: Actually, it is an impossible task, but in bravely attempting to fulfill it, you might achieve truth or greatness or inspiration.”—Kim Stanley/Interview with James Grissom/Photograph by Arnold Newman

------------------------

“Anger should not be confused with passion, and far too many people operate solely on anger, and this cannot produce art that is valuable. Our anger should arise over situations, conflicts, lacks, needs, and our application of these angers toward an act—of creation or caring or anything to which we can give ourselves—purifies the anger and turns it into something useful: A witness, a testimony.

…

“One of the great gifts of art is that it can purify anger. Art takes the anger and puts it to a good use. Until you are ready to release your anger, do not approach your art, or you will destroy it.“—Martha Graham/Interview with James Grissom

Is there another instrument of inquiry than thought? | J. Krishnamurti

Show me how to dissolve the ‘I’ | J. Krishnamurti

What is the action of not letting memory intrude? | J. Krishnamurti

How do I deal with my deep-rooted emotion? | J. Krishnamurti

How does one break free of habits? | J. Krishnamurti

How does one negate the 'I' without suppression | J. Krishnamurti

Growth and change | J. Krishnamurti

early morning confession, late last night

 I feel totally self deprived tonight. I care so much about what I do, in pursuing my acting talent. I know I am a better actor than what contemporary style of acting is out there. I am not going to accept this failure I have been going through. I am so sick of this bullshit acting I have been trying to exterminate from my body. No one can see the changes I need to go through in order to fulfill the type of destiny I know I am capable of.

This is why I have transformed myself over the years, by developing my thoughts through a chorus of ideas made, meant to build my sense of a private nature, that I share with the world through my personal spirituality.

The customs I have come to adopt, in relation to this craft is a learning process unlike any other I have yet to experience. To be able to work on my skill, in training my mind to perform a life altering form of experience is a benefit of mine.

This great ordeal, as I have been working day and night to try accomplish, is truly a force of nature I intend on keeping myself.

===============

To do a good job in nailing each scene I do, and not feel what I call "the need". Its only reward is that I offer humanity something they know has never been seen before. I become a source. This to me is my pursuit in becoming the actor I want to be.

==================

"The need" I define as an empty feeling, that I am open and available in my souls operation.

----------------------------

I turned back to acting for a reason, and it is no coincidence the U-turn I have made, has changed my experience in life up to this point.

When I went back into the acting, it gave me renewed hope in my ability. I want no credit for that. As a result of returning, I simply wanted to remind myself what a good human being does, because I think genuinely about another human being - I want what is good for that person. That is the true purpose of my journey. I am just so frustrated when I am in class, I see people that do not want to act. It is hard to get use to.

 

I am not sure if I agree with Krishnamurti, here, on the nature of reality vs our worldly appetites.  

If we are in search of a revolution where the state is responsible for the people taking action; yet the state of those in power call protesting its own government as 'unlawful'.  How can that be true? If the truth behind the people's actions are that of a government's oppression of those people.  It is known as a double standard.  

OW - in the spirit of revolutionary aims

 "We are punished for our refusals. Every impulse that we strive to strangle broods in the mind, and poisons us. The body sins once, and has done with its sin, for action is a mode of purification. . . . Resist it, and your soul grows sick with longing for the things it has forbidden to itself, with desire for what its monstrous laws have made monstrous and unlawful. It has been said that the great events of the world take place in the brain. It is in the brain, and the brain only, that the great sins of the world take place also."

--from THE PICTURE OF DORIAN GRAY

January 10th 2025

How people have that inner ability, do devalue what things stand right in front of them, as something else, such as living a lie... is far too easy to predict. - Marco

Marco Almeida

As for every two-faced person you may ever come across; I will not fall victim to - only because of their ignorance over me. Not on my watch, they shall never truly contact with me.

================

- I get the feeling of being shell shocked, because I choke on my own shit too easily. It comes into the narrative approach toward another point of view, that goes completely over my idiot brain.

I. U ever get the nice girl in the room, testing out your training signals, as if, (she)too see if you "get it".

Now only if I were picky enough to identify with her, would I have been able i.e. "available" to give her the proper feedback. But my stupidity took over that moment, so instead, she sees only what I gave her as the people pleaser I am - that I am enabled by her. Like fuck, such a cool person to me, I come off as (a) fitting a square into a triangle. Mother fucking me.

God damn it, the corrupt generation has me in, presently brain washed from my surfer self. Asshole fucks.

-------------------------

Marco Almeida

The irony is nothing short of coincidence, I'm being faced with this exact same thing today of all days.

Leviticus 25.17

 

Friday, January 10, 2025

The god fearing pursuit of reality (deluxe addition)

Simply, the human condition rests on guilt. Not wanting to feel guilt, therefore we all fear it so we purge the body from it. We find excuses moat familiar to us. Those same excuses are meant to avoid or pardon facing our own guilt. As result we lie to ourselves. This is human nature. It is incumbent upon ourselves. We learn. We train ourselves in error.

Guilty of superstition

Fate can't conceal the blood on our hands.

It is no accident.

When in control...

The terror lives in your eyes.... so is murder.

Superstition gets you nowhere with guilt.

Because guilt is not something you can take for granted.

Guilt implies the body purges the sinner from sin.

When we think of guilt it also implies its meaning; that because we cancel guilt over the shame we feel... only once it has been cancelled. We do not have to take ownership of our guilt.

Psychopathic behavior breaks psychological rules of convention which would result in not caring for a persons safety comfort or well being.

We don't want to feel the guilt nor made to.

BigC at 5:16 PM

Simple version of my thesis stated above is as follows:

No one ever wants or cares to admit they are in the wrong. So they make excuses. We all do. No matter if you consider yourself to be a sinner or not. We all make the same excuse in a lie. Whether or not you agree.

Timothy 3.16

 

The statistical analysis of a brain freeze

 °●°○°○○°▪︎°○°○°

What posers in disguise

 °●°●°○°▪︎°▪︎°

my costing autonomy of indiscretion

 °●°●°○°○○°°

 

 Super Mario lives. 🇨🇦 🇵🇹 

This pic brings a tear to my eye and feeling a lump in my throat.

My dad is courageous and did so much for me in caring for his family.

His smile touches my heart like nothing else will.

I am not going to lie about what he means to me. How proud he makes me.

Living in a world from which I've learned from him, he taught me what human conduct is. He exemplifies excellence. What things are and the way things should be... if you work really hard.

He is a leader and does not exhibit this very natural quality.

He is a man of god. He honors...

No matter the obstacles. 

No matter the prejudice made againat him..

He stands alone. ❤️

°○○○●••°°

Exodus 14.14

 

Pessoa

 

~ Romans 5.1

 Peace on earth....

My dad holding me when I was a new born.

Something you lack in talent

 January 8th 2011

I make up for a litany of non-recyclable items, such as the minister of the interior, because as long as I can con you into believing I am the innocent one - it's all good, right.

 

For this most part of my adult life, I've never been so ashamed to be a man i.e. of visionary quality.

 

Not only are people blind as bats, they've somehow turned a love of wisdom; we now live in an age of esoteric chance.

 

Gone are those days we thought of beforehand, waiting for it to happen.  Instead, the bottomless envy of disparity among living sentients, produced a more clever way of thought, of informing the mind as if a robot of choice agreements, without the retribution or reciprocation into - into a polarity that must be present if anything is to happen.

 

So here we are stuck in the mud today, together, tomorrow, now and forever.  Amen?

 

---------------------

 

Unfortunately, such bullshitting took place long before the mind can eliminate that unconscious use for polarity in disguising our inner most thoughts.

===================

For every naturalist sieve... there are, there are, i. un

questionable amounts of pious zealots who do not question such disparaging novelty or concern.

-----------------------

Marco Almeida was born and was also raised a Catholic. One day, he realized... Such "self-awareness" discounted a vast field of glowing restraint. Once more. Twice. They don't even know it.

=================

"Gone are those days we thought of beforehand, waiting for it to happen. Instead, the bottomless envy of disparity among living sentients, produced a more clever way of thought, of informing the mind as if a robot of choice agreements, without the retribution or reciprocation into - into a polarity that must be present if anything is to happen."

Put a copy of this on your bedpost, keeping it as reminder, that you only wish you had wrote it yourself.^

involuntary sounds of discretion

 January 8th 2010

This was why. The very reason you suggesting a protest against my better judgment. It wasn't that I didn't care or misunderstand, therefore, you had no right. It became clearer, less clearer, then clear to me again - repeating the same thing's I saw over and over and over in my mind so to speak. How it didn't occur to me, as I shut my eyes, is that by virtue of me alone - never mattered. Like I failed to exist, though something had to have happened in order for me to figure things out in a manner of doing.
I never ceased to realize that, until I became provided with the smallest degree of satisfaction I could think of. And there you have it, voila, the reality of barely keeping up. I manage to stay in the rat race, for no longer than my age, it will not suggest - however. However, the critical point of detail came through to me sooner than I anticipated, it came to me by surprise in fact. I was always someone, that was happy, more than happy, to oblige. From here, you never truly saw me standing there did you, did you ever once. So you got up and left, not even a word goodbye, but knowingly - deliberately making it's grand exit, fast, easy, gone. How sad I was, it became a damaging part of my wounded psychic ability. On my part, it told me not to stay away, but I couldn't help it. I guess this makes me as selfish as you. Not so proud of myself doing that.

This monologue appears not to address, what you really have done, which is my time spent wondering about. Why is it - that I didn't come to you before so I could tell you this face to face. You were always too good for me. It wasn't that I wasn't good enough, - but - that I became. Not good enough. It's so weird, because I could have sworn that something was wrong, only too young and naive to make prior assumptions at the risk of myself losing it. Although I feel right about what I'm saying, the truth still hasn't changed, I am disappointed in myself for not seeing it earlier. You actually caused so much of my buried depression, not to uncover itself. It is inexcusable of me to say it any other way. (Not that I am high on dramaturge.) I was just there - if not for you - in spite of my choice in being there. It's a psyche of the kind you grew immune to me. Under which those same circumstances remained the same, I acquired a noble gesture, which you mistook for it.

I felt the day's going by without a whisper, faint, yet bold. To realize how big I am for saying, you only wanted to know, how much YOU needed me. It never occurred to you any other way. My needs or anyone else's remain trivial unless otherwise. It always came back to me, when forgetting what I abandoned seemed so implausible, yet right at the same time. I have never said, I need, before. I never thought someone would consider me saying that about me. You needed me more than I needed you, sat with me just fine, until I figured I was never aware.

 planet earth has no past due date; nor are we its expiration. - Marco

I just figured out why people are full of themselves - so much so that they've no personal renunciation of it.

The first signal that someone tries to cut you off at the knees, they fill out a prescription in their minds. The second time it happens, comes whether or not you're inconveniencing their repressed energy. For shame you knit wits.

Winnipeg as an artist

 January 8th 2020

Here is the bottom line on pursuing the journey in becoming an actor.

The truth is it takes guts. That's it. It takes something special to be truthful and it takes guts to get there. To do it.

I am sick of hearing how good or bad I am depending on where you practice acting.

For whatever reason the perception has always been the places to be are outside of Winnipeg.

I say it is more bold to take your time in Winnipeg at practicing what kind of actor you are.

I could never wrap my head around it.

Why do I want to move outside myself. Is it a poor excuse to model what I believe I have is in Winnipeg. An excuse that you need to move past your comfort zone in order to succeed.

Toronto Vancouver LA have nothing to do with mastering your craft in the normative sense.

Winnipeg for me is far more affordable.

And to preach the way I have is not in the form of outside pressure. I truly believe the challenge of becoming an actor no matter where you are is enough.

I never believed it when people would look at me and say you can't make it in Winnipeg. If you were serious you'd be somewhere else. What the fuck. There is nothing wrong with the place I'm in. It just blows my mind.

My standards would be no different than what my intent is to be an actor. People say it takes guts to move away. I say it takes more guts to be in Winnipeg and defeat that norm.

 I speak and speak but the listener retains only the words he is expecting. It is not the voice that commands the story: it is the ear. ~Italo Calvino

(Book: Invisible Cities)

Consciousness in truth

 This is the closest interpretation to what consciousness is (how we can understand therefore define it...) that I have come across. Speaking as a philosopher this is not an easy thing to do. It's what makes Krishnamurti a genius and why I post his work so so much as I do. He deserves respect. Is swept under the rug and not mastered as curriculum at a university level.  - Marco 

the ultimate self purge

 

2 John 1.6

 

metacognition

 What is Meta cognition if not an amplified measurement of psychological time. This is me talking. How do we know that I know what I mean or not. (You can be open to decide this.) You ask questions. It's that simple. But predominantly white elitist thinking don't wander very far from their own measured reality. We are all imposters if not for rationally looking at things we feel are immune to us. We are all born slaves to reasonably assume the world should not revolve around us... even infancy out from a mother's womb. That last sentence is the key to having an open mind.

- Marco

 The pursuit of happiness although a principle rule cannot be followed nor executed to a standard because it's invisible.

MA2025

 “Time and Space are not prior to creation, they are forms under which creation becomes thinkable.”

–George Santayana

Marco Almeida

What is rational?

What is breathing.

What is sound.

What is light.

What noise is it a puppy makes if they are in need of something.

I don't know nor understand if there is a necessity behind my questions. But I do know that I know none of the answers to the statements that inform my questions.

So if time and space are not prior to creation. Just thinking as I sit here is how I process it. (My statements)

I know I made the statements but can they prove to be anything worth my rationale. = what is thinking.

If God said: let there be light.

^ Is that the answer to why light exists? How is that possible? God does not say let there be time, or let there be space. The first thing god created was light. Without which, light if absent, we would know that there is nothing to be had.

Such is thinking about what is thinkable.

===========

So my question now is - is light thinkable? If I were nothing but a dream state, how would I know the difference between darkness and light.

impartial amounts of rhetorical satisfaction

 I don't know where the words came from, so I asked myself - could passion be a case between acquiring my basic voluntary movement, then to, a much deeper opinion of myself. What would I say. It's scary not to think of myself in such perfect circumstances. It's having a conversation with yourself, whether it be negotiable or not, perhaps it's implicit of me to say that is so. Most of these inhibitions, are drawn from the ground up. Rooted from a need to contact something or someone much as a gopher, pops it's head out to see what is the matter, then returns to it's subterranean environment. Clever creatures they are. However, meaning without words is a constant reminder of unfulfilled satire. What truly matters. So you fill the void with meaning of some infinite variety. Only you can't escape from it. It is kind of like travel, some prefer not to - while other's take plane rides for specifically unknown plausibility.

I so often think - how impractical this situation of resistance plays a part of my life. Which way am I turning, where am I going, that in truth - it's such a bad habit. Yet - I experience this idea on my own, only to find it lost. Finding myself lost - might be a good idea. So I stick to that.

The sensation of being found after hiding, is cause for a relevant concern, or something immaterial that provides you a sense of response, where you forge a relationship. Each or every certain presumption, I sit there, observing it's pristine or engaging nature. It's in fact a matter of presumption. Everything might hang by a thread, a position of discretion, a cause for uncertainty, it has no other choice to make.