Dearest Hosanna

god help me.
This I love.
I have found my achilles heel,
as the narcissist runs blind.
Better fortune in time.

Easter Sunday confessional

I feel an irony of this year's Easter weekend happening for me all over again, as if a ghost summoned from my past? Perhaps, my senses are at a new found heightened level of awareness that has been found. I can be certain it is an emergence of some sort, a kind of renewal actively seeking itself. A part of me has grown exponentially over the years, more specifically due to my recent awakening, as I find myself in a place of peace within my soul.

For this much to have in my life, at this moment, I believe nothing will change that. All I can look forward to is how everything I share seems to be perfectly in sync with my world view.

Easter can mean many things such as chocolate covered Easter candy, to many different people, I see myself taking what life brings for chance unlike anything I've experienced ever before.

Negative thoughts

In the past six months I've gone through what has been a significant increase in my self-perception. Judging from my previous experience, this radical awareness that I've become more in touch with my true sense of self. My self-image is kept under serious scrutiny in how I feel about myself and my responsibility to myself as an individual in managing those emotions, or in other words, I'm not as self-critical when examining my own insecurity. When in the past the results of meaningless details would make up my entire world-view, now, I realize my mistakes allow me to focus on why I may have failed on a particular task.

I credit my therapy with Dr. Gordon.

What's helped me come to terms with the false beliefs I might otherwise had felt overwhelmed, such as, my pursuit in acting was important. I can be satisfied with being in control of my future whatever the chances are; if my destiny in this case is to work with my dad in his cleaning business I am not living in a fantasy world or feel guilty of a unfulfilling fantasy.

My desire is not to be telling fairy tales, but happier to make positive chioces in my life. I know in my heart that I can count on the present manner I'm expressing is about action.

Matrix Evolution

One of the more intriguing aspects of the movie The Matrix Revolutions is what this film represents. In the movie there is a tribe of renegades (humans) trying to combat hostile forces dominated by machines (super-cyborgs-nation). In order to infiltrate the superior autonomous race of machine, the human race had been reduced to supplying the machine world with energy resources. Humanity was extinguished due to the inhabitable conditions of planet Earth, which were caused by humans immoral consumption (by virtue of greed) destroying the planets renewable fossil fuels, as result, through nuclear warfare against the machines. In turn, the machines adopted humans as the primary energy source through use entropy, which the human body can only produce it's own electric property.

I titled this 'evolution' because of the significant changes that I see in the movie, however, subjected to my interpretation are independent therefore in no way have mention within the story. (note: Because this is my adaptation of the actual story, it serves as a critique relating to it in a positive manner.)

There is irony in the quasi-factual metaphor of a world dominated by machines, which is not stated clearly enough. In reality the film is made to make-believe that machines have the power to reverse the entire course of humanity, based on a pseudo-modified perspective that machines (not humans) are autonomous therefore have civil rights, ecetera, hitherto pertaining to laws, regulations, and all that there is in command. Essentially, the human race is nothing, whereas the weather has no implications on humanity, waging war, and have no respect to resolution or settling indifference, impartial to all human activity.

There is no after-life, as only death seems immanent remains as the one true course of all ‘rejected’ humans that live in a subterranean world called ‘Zion’. In the movie, everything is backwards given only to alienate a known non-fictional world of possibility.

In the movie the machines appear only to destroy Zion. The desperate situation is to make peace with the machines. The machines created a program where the factory of non-living sentient, benign, pro-creating humans are linked. There are agents, which the program deploys to ensure order is maintained against any hacking that may disrupt the machines system in the matrix.

Only once a hero emerges to combat the machines agents, can the program be saved from agent-Smith developing its own regenerating super-race. The matrix is destroyed once and for all, after Neo joins the machines to preserve a model of self-awareness that can save humanity. The moral of the story is the classical perseverance of human sacrifice and emotion. This allows the machines to interact with all things in the matrix being equal. The question is of blind faith, and whether or not humanity can extinguish itself, or continue to live freely in the capacity it once had established? Neo becomes part of the machine world, completely unaware of the matrix. Neo - now a part of the machine, Neo enters the matrix in order to destroy agent-Smith. Agent Smith represents an internal conflict that replicates itself as if a virus, which the external cause of humanity must overcome.